If i died tomorrow, here's what i would want you to know

Alright. So enough starting off with this "sorry i haven't written in a while" bullshit. I'm sorry people, I'm a busy girl. Not like anyone else even reads this (other than Ben Eastman occasionally), but whatevs.

To myself in the future: Loves forever but yeah there's gonna be a chunk of November that you're just not going to remember.

Anyways...the semester is about to end (thank God). I have my first of three finals tomorrow at 7:30 and yes it is now 2:48. Good job me but fuck math 105. I have successfully switched my lessons over to Margarat and unsuccessfully told Steve Colburn that i will not be taking lessons with him next semester. I have, however, successfully fooled him into thinking i am taking lessons with him next semester. My grades are probably not what i want them to be right now which is 3.8 or higher, but this first semester sucked major ass. I am not even going to lie. There has been one good thing about it though:...

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You know what?? On second thought this semester hasn't done shit for me.

I'm pretty much totally ready for Christmas break. I think i need a really really really fucking long break because Summer wasn't enough to make me want to go back to school. I'm sure that winter won't be either but i need something that'll motivate me to go back to school and try hard and all that good shit...hopefully winter break will be that Savior.

Speaking of Christmas break, i don't know how i am going to do all of the things that i have been telling everyone that i'm going to do with them. I do know that on the 23, i will be hanging out with Steph and seeing a movie and going to fuel, which i am really really excited about. I decided that i miss that girl way to much....

As for the grade school ladies, we are currently working on a day when we can all meet up but due to Kayla's gay home depot schedule, we have not really found a date that will work out for us.

Emily and all those engaged friends that i have?? Well....we're still working on that too.

Also, might i mention that i was planning on working a ridiculous amount over January because i am as broke as a joke. On top of visiting Steph at Valpo....and seeing Graeme and all that stuff...ugh i just don't know how i am going to do it all.

Oh well, i'm an awesome planner, i will figure it out.

So anyways...what have i been up to lately?? Well i definitely had a fucking awesome weekend with my gay lovers TJ and Elliot. really, without them, i never would have made it through the semester. They fucking rock. Watching them fight was so hard for me, but i think that they're over that almost right now...so whatevs. I'm happy. I'm just glad that they're talking again.

I was always closer with TJ than i was with Elliot but this weekend i think that i really got to bond with Elliot because it was the first time that we ever really got to hang out. He's totally my queen:) And TJ is my knight in shining armor.

Sometimes i have weird thoughts like what if i die tomorrow? Which i know isn't weird because everyone has thoughts like that , but seriously though. If i died tomorrow i think i would be good on the heaven sitch, and all that, but would i get to say goodbye to everyone i loved??

I know everyone thinks that im outspoken and all that, but there's some things that i haven't said to people (believe it or not) that i ask myself why i don't tell them like all the time. Which is one of the reasons i keep this blog i suppose.